Jeff Burkhart: When an ID goes ‘mysteriously’ missing

It wasn’t busy, which was both a blessing and a curse. The blessing is that not all “busy” is good busy. For instance, the person who sends you into the back three times for their water — wrong glass, too cold, too warm — probably is not the person you want to spend all of your time with. But people often make up for their own inadequacies by searching out inadequacies in others. And what easier target is there than someone tasked with service?

The young woman had sat somewhere in between those trips into the back. I stepped up to her, and wiped the “just-right” water off of my hands.

“Two Paper Planes,” she said.

She was under 30 years old in my estimation. And I do have to make that estimation about 50 times a night. I’ve done it every night for 35 years, so I have gotten rather good at it.

“May I see some ID?” I asked.

She sighed and rolled her eyes. I already knew where this was going. One of the two types of people who put up the biggest fuss when they get “carded” are the people who are just 22 years old. They are so old now, they seem to think.

She produced an ID that was vertical in orientation. These are the IDs that are given to people under 21 years old. The state of California tries to make identifying underage IDs easy by making the two age groups distinct in regard to the card they carry. The problem is that the ID doesn’t necessarily expire on one’s 21st birthday.

I looked at it closely. It had a picture that looked like her, it was issued by a valid governmental agency, it had a birthdate that made her over 21 and it was not expired. It was all good, except for one thing.

“I need to see an ID for the other person, too,” I said.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“You ordered two drinks. I need to see both people’s ID.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Two drinks need two IDs,” I repeated.

“She will be here in a minute,” she said.

“Her drink will have to wait until she gets here.”

That did not go over well. The fallout was still going on when her friend arrived five minutes later.

“He,” said the first young woman, jabbing her backwards-facing thumb at me, “won’t make your drink until he sees your ID.”

“This is ridiculous,” her newly arrived friend said. “I work for (insert foodie magazine based in San Francisco).”

“OK,” I said.

She looked at me. I looked her up and down and judged her to be around the same age as her friend.

“So, I need to see some ID,” I reiterated.

“Didn’t you hear me?” she asked. “I write for …”

“I heard you,” I said. “But I still need some ID.”

She demanded to see the manager. When that manager arrived, she engaged in exactly the same conversation. When the young woman said, “Maybe you didn’t hear me,” to that manager, it really didn’t go well.

“I felt like he was judging me,” said the young woman, indicating me.

“He was judging you,” said the manager. “He has to judge how old you are.”

It was as reasonable and rational an explanation as could be possible. Yet strangely, it felt still inadequate.

“You guys really need to review your age-verification policies,” she said.

“OK,” said the manager.

“My editor is going to hear all about this,” she said. “I go out in San Francisco, and I have never had this problem.”

“OK,” said the manager.

“This is ridiculous,” continued the young woman. “You guys really need to work on your customer service skills.”

There are two instances when the adage “the customer is always right” fails utterly. One is getting served in the first place. And the second is having service suspended. Both are a judgment call on the part of the server, and only on the part of the server. Servers should tread lightly here, because all the rules regarding discrimination do remain in effect, excepting, of course, the one regarding age.

“I am sorry,” replied the manager. “If you could just provide us with your ID, we can all move on from this.”

The young woman crossed her arms defiantly.

“I don’t have my ID,” she said.

Leaving me with these thoughts:

• The other type of person who makes a huge fuss about being asked for ID is the person who doesn’t have one.

• The difference between being 20 and 21 years old seems monumental at the time. But the only difference between being 21 and 22 is that you are one year closer to 30.

• Section 25658(a) Business and Professions Code (Sale to a Minor): Every person who sells, furnishes, gives, or causes to be sold, furnished or given away any alcoholic beverage to any person under the age of 21 years is guilty of a misdemeanor.

Jeff Burkhart is the author of “Twenty Years Behind Bars: The Spirited Adventures of a Real Bartender, Vol. I and II,” the host of the Barfly Podcast on iTunes (as seen in the NY Times) and an award-winning bartender at a local restaurant. Follow him at jeffburkhart.net and contact him at jeffbarflyIJ@outlook.com