I was a perfect trad wife for 10 years then got divorced & had to learn how to live – I’m 34 & only just learnt to drive
A FORMER trad wife has revealed the struggles she faced when she got divorced and had to learn basic skills like driving a car.
A trad wife (short for traditional wife) is a woman who chooses to take on an ultra traditional role in marriage, meaning she makes dinner and looks pretty whilst her husband goes to work.
Tradwives choose to dress in the style of clothing popular in this period ( think floral dresses and frumpy cardigans).
Additionally, the values considered important to tradwvies are similar to strict Christian values.
Tradwives state that they are not forced into this way of life, and believe that it is their purpose to be homemakers.
Ophelia Maraschino revealed that she had been a trad wife for 10 years, after getting married at the extremely young age of 17.
In a TikTok video, Ophelia, who is from Melbourne, Australia said that by the time she was 21, she had two children under three, and spent her entire time caring for them and her husband.
She explained that the children were only allowed to go to a Steiner school, where they weren’t allowed to use any screens or tech.
The mum described the school as ‘culty’ and said that she wouldn’t have chosen to send the children there herself, but had no choice.
Ophelia said that when she was a trad wife, she loved her husband “unconditionally” and would do anything that he said.
Unlike many trad wives, Ophelia said that she did work, but it was only seven hours a week.
She said: “It was not enough to have financial independence, but enough to have a bit of pocket money.”
Upon realising that the trad wife life was not for her, Ophelia decided to leave but said that she had no ability to make money, due to her lack of employment history.
The mum of two is now 34 years old and is just starting a degree, and has learnt how to drive.
“I’m a good 10-15 years behind everyone else my age in terms of setting up my finances and building a career for myself”, she said.
Ophelia warned other women against following the trad wife lifestyle, as she said if they ever get divorced, they will find it extremely hard to find a job.
The mum’s video, which was posted under the username @ophelia.maraschino, has likely struck a chord with many people, as it has racked up over 174,000 views on the video sharing platform.
Signs of financial abuse
- stopping you from going to work, college or university
- causing you to lose out on benefits by not letting you go to appointments at the Jobcentre or apply for jobs
- controlling your access to essential things, such as food, clothing or transport.
- forces you to take out money or get credit in your name
- makes you hand over control of your accounts – this could include changing your login details
- cashes in your pension or other cheques without your permission
- adds their name to your account
- pressures you to change your will in a way you’re not comfortable with
- has offered to buy shopping or pay bills with your money, but takes it, and doesn’t use the money how you agreed
- asks you prove what you’ve spent your money on
- stops you accessing your bank, loan or credit card accounts
- controls what you can and can’t spend your money on
- sets up Direct Debits from your account to pay bills which aren’t yours or pay for goods and services which you haven’t bought
- pressures you to arrange for your benefits to be paid into a bank account you don’t have access to
- pressures you to draw down, transfer or stop making pension payments
- makes you take out new insurance policies or stops you paying your existing ones.
- To gain access to help, you can contact Women’s Aid: on their website, and online chat service.
- You can also call the freephone 24-Hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 200 0247
TikTok users raced to the video’s comments section to share their thoughts.
One person said: “I’m so proud of you.
“I left last year and it was the best thing I ever did”.
A second person said: “I was a trad wife and got divorced at 28 and I couldn’t be happier”.
A third added: “This is exactly why I would never be a trad wife”.
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